I lost my best friend today

Words are going to be meanless today cause you have gone away, Ayush. you'll never come back .. leaving the empty space in my life. I cannot tell u - ours 10 years of friendship is moving in front of my eyes. how we met and how we became friends. you made my life easy in gurgaon.. i am reliving every memory today. it feels so empty. 

Hardcore Romantic

Lockdown 2020 is pretty good for a person who like cute-romantic series. I end up watching The Middle and let me tell you, this series is hands-down awesome! 

The characters, a story of 5 and how the family is the most important relationship of all. Well... I have so much to say.. I will save this post with a date - June 8, 2020 - DLF phase 2 Gurgaon house. As nobody is reading my blog so I guess it kind of awesome to mark all the important dates. What say? 

Well.. yeah! The Middle - good watch if you love your family. Well...duh! Who doesn’t? 

Oh! BTW I will keep filling the blog with all the post dates so that When I read them after 5 years.. i have something to look back upon. 

Starting tomorrow... i’ll be writing down and making an entry of my past good things. 

No more in the middle! 

Why does it hurt so much?

Hey blog! 

Look what a damn good year I selected to revisit/revive my blog... 2020. Eh?! 

All those - Coronavirus, cyclones, work-from-homes, #blacklivesmatter - we are surviving... haa! (Is this haa or huh? What should be the right expression?) Anyways! We all in the middle of so many things (fortunate that we all are still alive/ unfortunate for those who aren’t), I am really looking forward to going back in time. 

A time where : 

1. You used to receive long emails from your friends and not your Amazon order details or so many stupid newsletters to those you never subscribed or at least you remember subscribing them. 

2. You don’t have the need to have long meaningful conversations... (not at least with one person). 

3. You can run to your parents house without worrying about all your-wifey duties. Well, it’s entirely the fault of this patriarchy system or the upbringing. Cause, S doesn’t give a hoot about me being in the house or not. May be it’s entirely your guilt cause you never saw your mom living her dreams. 

4. You can download Tinder without being judged. Or afraid about what if S’s friend see me there? 

5. You can go back to reading books not because you have to pretend but because you genuinely like reading them. 

6. You can just feel loved... (real those romantic ones - soulful) NOT bollywoodish. Puke! 

7. You can go back to your failed diet or exercise routine. No matter how much time you fail, you still go back; thinking you can do it this time! 

8. You don’t have to pretend to be happy. You can be one naturally! 

9. Lastly, you cannot be HURT! No matter how much rock bottom you hit, you’ll come back with same smile and enthusiasm. 

Well, there are a few oddly written ‘Wheres.’ But I guess I have this much for today. I will sleep tonight (basically this morning) with this thought that someday, every thing will return to normalcy and the heart won’t ache so much! 

Till then, sleep tight, people! 

We’ll survive this 2020! 

Present

In 5 years, would we wonder how we were back then in our early 30s? Would we seat around at a coffee table with all the 20s and may be 15s hovering around us in skimpier clothes? Would we just sip our wine and champagne and talk about how life has changed for good after all?

Talking about this, with my girl best friends, D just said, we were and are living our age. Are you? Did we? Or Will us? Nobody knows, but I hardly remember being 25 anymore. I don’t remember the dreams I had back then. I don’t remember the wishes either. Or any other things I care about quite really. All I remembered, I have gained a bunch of friends and I am proud to tell that they are my friends. Be it Preeti, Annie, Dubey, AM, Sanju… then I moved on, and met set of two more wise women, Shelly and Chitra. Then I got married to this MAN, still unknown to me at times. However the life seems to be perfect. I don’t need anyone else by my side. For now.

Talking about things of the future, nobody knows really what is going to happen. Certainly not me. All I know life cannot be more perfect than it is right now.